Skin and Bones

It is 3:08 in the morning as I write this. An inner battle just took place in my mind. A spiritual battle is what I am referring to.

The Evil One is good at his job and he comes in all shapes and sizes. Clever. I will at least give him that. He is very clever.

As the inner turmoil is just beginning the Holy Spirit inside of me is quick to differentiate between my thoughts, the Spirit’s thoughts, and the Evil One’s thoughts. The conversation within me continues as I am merely a spectator now. Minutes go by while the Geology pages turn. As I am about to turn the page I realize that my eyes passed over the words but they were not read. My mind was else where. I will even admit to having highlighted and starred and added notations to where my subconscious thought my conscious would place them if it were present. I decide to wait until the conversation in my head was over before I continue with homework. There really isn’t much point. Once the three of us get started it’s hard to stop us until a decision is made.

For you see, the Deceiver is getting stronger. I can tell that as his lies are whispered they some how seem to continue to make the truth sound softer. Soon enough they sound roughly about the same volume. My own mind joins in. Reminding the two gentleman in the room that I am still there. This was a big mistake. Now the Deceiver can focus on me instead of continuing to argue with the Almighty. I should have let Him handle it. As he talks I can hear the soft echo, “that’s not true.” “are you really going to believe that?” I know that what he is saying is wrong. My conscious is FULLY aware that lies are being spoken to me, but for some unexplainable and irrational reason I still desire to listen to his treachory. As my decision was made and my walls went up, pushing the Holy One away. I knew I had lost this round. And as soon as the battle was over. The Liar retreated. Leaving me standing in the middle of the room. Without him to defend me as I faced the judgement. He had left me alone and hurt. Facing the reality of what I am. Flesh.

Mmmm feelin’ good.

I think there are moments when God encompasses you with peace, comfort, hope, stability, and joy because He is rising you up out of the darkness, despair, dirt, and brokenness that you have been sitting in for quite sometime. I almost never thought this day would come. This breathe of fresh air. This moment of stillness. But it has arrived. My God is faithful.

This past week has began with so much darkness it was overbearing. But with a cry out for help and the power of prayer my Father’s strength is upon me. I almost feel like I am in this bubble that makes me untouchable. God’s Mighty Power was washed over me and I have content in His plan for me. Family has surrounded me and friends cling to me. I am not alone.

“But the Lord stood at my side and gave me strength, so that through me the message might be fully proclaimed and all the Gentiles might hear it. And I was delivered from the lion’s mouth. The Lord will rescue me from every evil attack and will bring me safely to his heavenly kingdom. To him be glory for ever and ever. Amen.” – 2 Timothy 4:17-18

Two songs that I want you to listen to… I have heard both one hundred times before, but I noticed the words for the first time this week. God delivers us from evil (Matthew 6:13). He is faithful.

- Sarah (:

1 Year Later: Here I am.

Wow! It’s been a year since I began blogging. My first post was on January 20, 2011. It is all thanks to my encouraging friends and family. But I must especially thank my mother for always encouraging me and pushing me towards writing and editing and writing some more. She leads me in my walk in my faith. Thanks Mommy, I love you. When you became published it made me determined to seek that accomplishment even more. The other person I cannot overlook is Sherri Webster. A beautiful soul and a spiritual mentor. She is humble and will scold me for even mentioning her in this post, but if it weren’t for Sherri I NEVER would have begun a blog. I am pretty sure it took me 6 months of Sherri saying, “Sarah, I think you would really like blogging.” “Sarah, if you started a blog so many great things could come from it.” “Sarah, I read this blog the other day and it made me think that you really should start one.” before I finally took her advice. And what a joy it has been to fall in love with blogging! I love you Sherri and I thank you for everything you do for me.

Anyways. To celebrate this accomplishment for myself I decided to think back over the year. Luckily I just did this due to New Years being so recent, but it was fun to add specific details of my blog.

In the past year, I….

• have lived in 4 cities: Atlanta, GA; Ocklawaha, FL; Reston, VA; and Knoxville, TN. [Atlanta Life, Southwind.2011, Nanny Life, Knoxville Life, College Life]
• graduated high school [post]
• started college [post]
• began Quest (Young Life Leader training) [post]
• broke my foot [post]
• wrecked/totalled my car [post]
• got accepted to the YWAM school in Australia for 2013 [post]
• and most importantly I deepened my relationship with the LORD Almighty. [Faith]

I have 112 followers and over 2,500 views. So thank you. It is an honor to feel heard and if anything comes out of my writing know that it is for the glory of God. He is My Creator and the Lover of my soul. HE is the reason that I write.

Also I updated small portions of my About Sarah page in order to keep it accurate!

- Sarah (:

He is Trying, but Failing

Satan is among us. He is here and ever present. But he has forgotten one thing. He CANNOT make me unsaved.

“We know that anyone born of God does not continue to sin; the One who was born of God keeps them safe, and the evil one cannot harm them.” – 1 John 5:18

I am under attack. As the evil one recognizes that my heart belongs to another he frantically tries to claim me as his. He uses bitterness to consume my thoughts. He reminds me of the hurt and anger and guilt of my sins’ past. He brings people back into my life for a glimpse of unadulterated hatred. But I will continue on the path towards righteousness.

“The joy of the LORD is my strength.” – Nehemiah 8:10

While I am fighting the inner sin and guilt that dwells in my fresh I cling to the words of John Piper in his talk at Passion 2012. If life is a metronome, people are born with their pendulum stuck on the sin side. When Christ died we were no longer stuck in sin. He took our debt, as only the perfect sacrifice could, and our pendulum moved to the complete other side of the metronome. There is no in-between and there is no exception. When I was saved I was saved.

This reminds me that while I sin (constantly) I am still loved by the God Almighty. Satan attacks my mind but He cannot touch my heart. ONLY the LORD can encompass my heart and soul.

So I do proclaim that I, “Love the LORD [my] God with all [my] heart and with all [my] soul and with all [my] strength and with all [my] mind” – Luke 10:27

Praise be to God. “Glory to God in the highest heaven, and on earth peace to those on whom his favor rests.” – Luke 2:14

- Sarah (:

Life as I Currently Know It.

Well… simply because of how my life has played out I have not written in quite some time. It’s not that I haven’t wanted to and it’s not that I couldn’t. It’s just that sometimes my lack of writing can express my emotion more than when I do write. And that’s ok. Because my favorite part of my blog is that it’s mine. I get to make the rules. So it’s time to summarize the past month:

MERRY CHRISTMAS!! I pray God gave you the gift you needed the most. Whether it was rest or love or hope. I can reassure you that when Jesus was born God delivered the most important package you will ever receive.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!! It’s 2012… DANG. I will be 19 this year. That means I am almost 2 decades old. That also means I’m supposedly on my way to full adulthood and life gets harder. That’s scary. But I pray your New Years celebrations were filled with joy. Mine were spent with my cousins on my Daddy’s side of the family. It was really fun and very much needed for my soul.

If you read my last post. I am in a much better place. God is faithful at all hours of the night. When I am lonely and heart broken He is there. He brings healing in the kindest and most unexpected places.

PASSION 2012 happened. I wish you had been there. And I am saying that to every person that reads this. Because it was amazing. God works in MIGHTY ways. I will start by saying that if you do not know what Passion is, it is a conference for college students that is hosted by Louie Giglio and a large team of other Christian role models. If you want to learn more go here. This year we were in the Georgia Dome with 45,000 students. I used to think I was alone in my faith. God showed me just how wrong I was. Also we raised awareness for human slavery. If you didn’t know… there are 27 million people enslaved in the world right now. 27 million. That is the largest number in all of history. We raised over 3 million dollars in funds to help bring awareness and deal with the sex trafficking, child labor, and forced labor victims around the world. I am now more anxious then ever before to join my YWAM team to help take care of this issue personally. It is awful. It is disgusting. And I will fight for as long as I can and as hard as I can to stop it. Someone MUST stand up for the people chained to the floor.

I went on a cruise. It was so much fun. My family and our close friend Kayla went on a 5 day cruise to the Bahamas! We set sail last week and are getting home tonight. I am more sunburned than tan and more stuffed than I have been in a long time. Seriously. The food is so good. #ChocolateMeltingCake it’s SOOO good. I made a fort in the trunk of my Dad’s lexus in order to be comfortable on the long drive, but hey… it was worth it! (: It was nice to rest and relax and prepare myself for the semester ahead…

[Savannah and Me right before we left port]

Speaking of this next semester. School began. I missed the first few days due to the cruise. But I am back at UT and ready to show them what I am really made of . Without the distractions of last semester I am prepared to be the student I know I can be and the student I like to be. Remember I was the little girl that could read before Kindergarten… I like school. So this school year should be better and I am excited to be a Tennessee Vol.

May God’s peace be upon you and may your heart be content in the place that God has put you. He has reasons that only He knows. Trust in Him.

P.S. I fell in love with Gungor over the cruise. I’ve loved a couple of their songs for a while. But my heart was reborn in their music. Look them up.

- Sarah (: